Longings, Part 2: Home

Transcript of a Sage Hill Live Fully Podcast conversation with Dr. Chip Dodd. Lightly edited for readability; speaker labels omitted.

You're listening to the Sage Hill podcast with Dr. Chip Dodd. Sage Hill is a social impact organization that helps people see who they are made to be so they can do what they're made to do. The following podcast was recorded at this year's Sage Hill training, an in-depth experiential training that helps people bring their heart to what they are called to do. To learn more, you can visit sagehilltraining.com. How come I did that? You know. You tell me. Because you know how to do it too. How come I went from this is so wonderful to, yeah, this is great. Good day. Friday's coming. Protect myself from grief. Alright. Great. Brace for hurt. Great. If you accept that you already have it, it won't hurt when it's confirmed. So you're always prepped. Like, don't get your hopes up in that way. You won't be too excited. Who taught you that? Somebody taught you that. You don't kids don't come up with that on their own. They don't. They they think in crazy thoughts like like like William, my youngest in college. He gets two hits his first game in college. Now he says he's not in college, but I swear I think I remember that. He said it was sixth grade, but I remember college. So he's probably right. But he said he said after his first game got two hits, he said, you know what, dad? I may not strike out this season. Do you get the if the basement like, yeah. I may not strike out this season. Like, I get that, but you will. K? So now that's William. That's listen. College baseball, you strike out a lot. And it it gets just gets worse. So that was, like, funny talk. Like, we gotta teach him again. I gotta go back through the mantra. You don't get your hopes up, and that way you won't be so disappointed. And, you need to, you know, like, understand that what goes around comes around, pull yourself up by your boots. So just give them all the downgrading stuff, like like, listen, dreams are made for disappointment and life's lessons are about you learning how to be disappointed really well. K? I think we're doing great here. Don't you think? So how come I had to come up with that thought because I know what that's like too? See, if you're gonna live a full life, you you have to be good at living between celebration and grief. Life is tragic and God is faithful. And all of life is made to be lived from from the the the the beginning of it to the end of it and everything in between of it and on a daily level. Now what makes life so celebratory wonderful and what makes life so incredibly grief filled? Well, it's the feelings that are the tools that speak it. It's the needs that are filled or not filled and let us be grateful or not grateful. It's the desire within us that takes that takes us close to how can we grieve so much, and how come we're made to celebrate so beautifully. It's longings. It's what longings are. A longing is a taste or touch of something that absolutely is wonderful. You're made for it. It completes you. It holds you. It it finishes you and yet you can't have it. You can taste it, you can touch it, but you cannot have it. Now, when you think about something so wonderful, touch it, and it is everything you've been looking for. But then you're told you can't have it. You're even told before you go do it. Let's say this, this is the thing that will make your life fulfilled. But you can touch it and you can taste it, but you can't take it with you. You can't have it. How many of you would say, I think I'm not gonna touch it or taste it today? Yes. To prevent yourself from absolutely hurt, loss, sadness, anger, dealing with the struggle, unfairness, having to question God, wonder what life's about, how come it has to be so painful, all that kind of stuff. And how many of you would go ahead and touch it and taste it? K. And then what? Yeah. And forever in pursuit of that thing. Do you know? But pain. So now if these longings are really that wonderful, and if you taste them and touch them, and you're made for them, you're born with them, and you taste them and touch them, but they leave you in pain, how many of you are like, I'm not so sure I wanna do this. K. Well, you have to if you're gonna be fully alive. We long for four things in this life. We long for home. And home is a place that please, I this was serious to them and I'll say it even though it sounds funny. Swing low, sweet chariot, coming forward to carry me home. K? I looked across the Jordan, and what did I see? Coming forward to carry me home. A band of angels coming after me, coming forward to carry me home. That was a a dirge. That was a song of death. That was a song of I don't wanna be here. That was a song of hanging on to hope in the midst of a place their work was dark to dark. And it just wasn't a good life. And they found something in it called longings to let them hang on, so to speak. Do you know? And I know that song doesn't get really probably good play much anymore. It's it's it's mocked a lot of times or something but that's an example of home. It's the home you're made to go to, and no matter what you do or how life life good life gets, you're still not there. Think about your perfect day and it was really really really like perfect, but think of all the stuff that you had to do to get ready for it to be perfect. K. And all your friends are laughing and people are just sharing how great you are and how much they appreciate all you're doing. It's like your food is so cool and and they just say and then somebody like says, I want you to have a thousand dollars because like, you're just the neatest person in the whole world. K? It's like and you've grown so much over the years. It's just phenomenal. It's like like, can we get together and you tell me your story because it's incredible. Alright? You're laughing. What are you laughing about? It does. It does. It does sound awesome, Alicia. And you're almost crying. Yeah. And the thousand dollars is just for you. The story is just like gravy or icing. Now, she said that would be amazing, which means she's been overwhelmed, which means this is too good to be true. And it is because what time they're leaving? Turn out the lights. The party's over. Go to bed by yourself again. And you are lonely on Monday and alone too, by the way, or something to that effect. Right? It's a song. Okay. I made it up. I don't I don't know you exactly. But I'm telling you, Sunday's terrible because Monday's worse and Monday's worse because Sunday was great. Okay. Now, you're longing for home. She had a taste of it. She had a feeling of it and even in the feeling of it, she stops to consider if this is it, it goes away. It's like you can't have it. Another example, I haven't seen the movie since I was a kid, but this e t movie. Remember that long time ago? I mean, it was like it's like an eighties movie. So E. T. And E. T, the most amazing thing, no one believed that E. T. Was there except for kids and then wounded people. The older son in the family was where there was a divorce, was very cynical and everything. And then the younger kid, I can't remember his name, Elliot, who was like dreamer and in pain and had no connections and adrift and kind of a lost child, finds an alien. Little girl introduces him and they wound up having a family around the alien. And then the mother got involved. And then there was a scientist, they were gonna, like, cut e t up to find out about about him. And because, you know, the Greeks, they had to cut everything up to find the truth instead of listening to the experience of what's happening around them to decide what needs to happen next. Okay? So so, e t e t says this thing and that everybody got on board who, like, ran into him. He drew them he drew others towards them from the heart because he was nothing but heart. E t was nothing but heart. And and I've said this before, but it's so brilliant because Stephen Spielberg put feet, a brain stem, and a limbic system on top of a brain stem with eyes. There was no cerebral cortex on BT. He was pure emotion. He was purely the emotional and spiritual center of a human brain, a human being. This is before, all of that stuff had been, like, completely discovered. You know? That's that was back when endorphins were the big rage. Just endorphins. You know, feel good chemicals of the brain. There was no limbic system discovery in spots, places, and how it's the emotional spiritual center of the person and stuff like that. So, anyway, so ET is the is the eyes of the heart enlightened. They don't have a cerebral cortex to defend himself from being himself. ET can't use his face to hide his heart because he's got no capacity to defend himself at all except to simply be his longings, be his feelings, be his needs, be his desire, be his longings, and be his hope. K? And ET wanted one thing. I mean, he loved Elliot and loved the little girl because he could, like, attach wherever he was because he was just like an attachment creature. But he had this thing in greater than greater than just attachment. The e t had this thing in him, I assume yeah, e t him. But this thing in him that was greater than attachment. That was willing to be in pain in letting go of attachment to go to where he was made to go. And e t said one thing, what was it? Do you anybody remember? ET what? ET phone home. And he said it in such a way that if you shut your eyes, you can hear the inner part, the inner self of you relating because he would say, e t for home. E t for home. E t for home. I wanna go home. Please take me home. Take me home. And do you know who flocked to that movie? Everybody. Grown ups. Grown ups and grown ups and grown ups. Now that's what I mean by the longing to go home. It's a spiritual thing inside of us that testifies in spite of science, in spite of all kinds of existential rationalization. There's something in us that is made to have a place that's not here and leaves us completely dissatisfied as long as we are here and wants to go to, dare I say, where we came from.

We wanna go back. This is Stephen James, the executive director of Sage Hill Counseling. Thanks for listening to the Sage Hill podcast with Dr. Chip Dodd. If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, anxiety, depression, or burnout, please reach out to the Center for Professional Excellence for help. For more than twenty years, CPE's long term residential treatment programs have been helping professional men recover their lives, marriages, and families. To find out more, visit cpenashville.com. Further, if you're a therapist, a pastor, or professional that works with people, and you'd like to be better equipped to help them live fully, we invite you to learn more about Sage Hill Training, an in-depth experiential training to help you bring your heart to the work you're called called to do. You can visit Sage Hill Training to register.